thankful

I am very behind on Eli progress but there is a reason for that. Two weeks ago, we skipped therapy because I was off work at it was his school fall party and I am not able to go to most parties and field trips because they fall on days that I work. I enjoyed spending the day with Eli who was dressed up as Mickey Mouse. The following week I had a lunch to attend at work so Andrew took the day off to take Eli to therapy so I could go enjoy the lunch.

We divided the speech and OT up this time. He came in for speech at 10:00, went home and took a nap, and came back at 1:00 for OT. Andrew seemed to think that that worked well for him. I am going to talk to the therapist this week to figure out if that is the best route for everyone. Andrew was amazed at the way the OT was able to keep Eli's attention and focus on one object at a time. Surrounding objects that used to make him go crazy are seeming to fade to the background and we are able to stay on task a lot better. We still have some melt downs but over all lots of improvement. I took him to target yesterday to start shopping for Christmas ideas and look for items for his new big boy room and we were in there at least 45 mins. I bought him some popcorn and an ICEE and he sat in the cart the whole time and I hardly heard a peep out of him. He was so content. After we went to Target, we went to Walmart to pick up a few more things for his room. We were only there for 15 minutes but he was still very good. The last 5 minutes he started getting a little grumpy but what child wouldn’t after 2 grocery stores and getting close to nap time.  

His speech is growing so much. He is coming up with words and sentences that blow me away. Some things are still very tough to understand but we are making a huge improvement. He talks NON-STOP! I love it most of the time. I also love the fact that I can joke with him about things and he seems to understand me and joke back. The play for his age is becoming much more age appropriate. Toys are being used for what they are made for.  He is starting to play pretend and that makes my heart happy to watch his little imagination at work. This week he has decided he is a cat named Figaro. If I call him Eli he tells me that is not his name he is Figaro. He also loves to pretend that he is a super hero.


We are starting to plan for baby number 2 which means converting Eli's current room into a nursery and making our guest room into his new big boy room. I am having so much fun shopping and planning for it but not so much fun making room for everything in our house. We have very small closets in each bed room and no extra closets in the house so finding room for everything that is stored in the guest room is going to be a long progress. Andrew and I are trying to work on it at least 20 minutes a night until we finish the room.

That is about all that is going on these last few weeks. As far as my pregnancy goes, everything is going pretty well so far. Just lots of morning sickness that I pray will calm down in the next few weeks.

I am so thankful for the support I have from mine and Andrews family and friends with everything that goes on. I always know if I need something, advice, help with Eli, or just an encouraging word, I have someone to call. I have had days where my patients gets worn thin. I have to remind myself that he is 3 sometimes and not 20. I have days where I feel like I have completely blown it as a mom but those same days he still hugs me at night and gives me a kiss and says "I love you night night mommy". It reminds me of God's grace and no matter how much we think we blow it sometimes, God is still always there to tell us he loves us. I am thankful for the good days and the bad ones because the bad ones just make the good ones that much better!

-Britt

Very Exciting Last Few Weeks

These last few weeks have been insane and have called for much needed mid day naps. Lots of things going on in the Thomas house hold these last few weeks starting with me finding out I am pregnant. We are very excited/ nervous for the new adventures ahead. Eli is happy to be a big brother. He says there is a baby in mommy's belly and his too. We are expecting a June baby. I have lived off of a 3 year olds diet because it is all that sounds good to me. Foods like, PB&J, chicken nugget,s and macaroni and cheese. All in all, everything with that seems to be going well.

I finally had the meeting with the school to go over Eli's progress. He had been tested for speech and other special education classes. (Some special classes such as group play and appropriate age play) He passed the special education classes and basically got the same review for speech that we had received at the other speech office.  We will have a speech therapist meet him at school 1 day a week and work with him. After one year he will be re-evaluated for his IEP (individualized education plan). Im glad to get the extra opinion and extra help while he is young so hopefully we can catch on quickly.

Speech and OT have been going pretty well. We are still working through a few melt downs but getting new approaches to work with him is very helpful. We are working on 'G' 'SH''K' & 'F' sounds right now. All sounds that come from the back of the mouth are hard for him. It is easier for him to use the front of his mouth and substitutes his sounds that are harder with the sounds that come from the front.

Andrew had me listen to some old voice mails that Eli and I had left him on his voice mail from work. They went back from when he was about 18 months old to just last week. WOW! We have come a LOOONG way in the last few months. He was very difficult to understand. I don’t think that I truly knew how bad it was because I knew what he was saying because I was always around him. His progress in incredible! I think that he may just be a little bit of a slower learner which is completely OK with me because I can be too. I think some things may not come as easy and fast as it does to other children.Some things he gets faster than other children.  Society puts such a emphasis on what is "normal" that is it scary when your child does not fall into that category at every landmark. I know my child is unique and created in God's image and he is perfect to me. He is his own individual and even though some things are tough, we will get there! I feel very encouraged that we will kick this speech and sensory issues to the curb before kindergarden.

So that is what is new for us.

-Brittany

Happy fall y'all!!!

Eli and I have been enjoying this amazing weather! Windows in the house open, fall candles burning (which he loves to blow out) and lots of playing outside. He has been enjoying walking out to the bottom of the woods with his daddy and checking the deer camera and looking for deer tracks. He has a field trip again next week to the corn maze. I am working so Andrew is going and I am slightly jealous that I wont be there. They are going on a hay ride, rubber duck race, corn maze, and pig race. Sounds like so much fun and I know they will have a blast. The following week he has his Fall party at school. He is dressing up as super why thanks to his Mimi who is making his costume. So many wonderful things going on this fall.

I was not feeling too good today so my mom took Eli to therapy and I went to the Dr. I am feeling much better now. Eli did very well in OT today. His attention span is again getting much better. He did 2 ILS sessions and participated in the games well. Speech again was a different story. I am beginning to wonder if 2 sessions back to back is too much for him so I may move OT to a different day and just have one class per day. His patients are not there in speech and he looses his ability to pay attention and gets very worked up when he has to sit down and listen.

I have actively been working on our trip to Disney for where to eat, what to do and I am soo excited. So many choices! I will be a Disney pro after this trip. Any restaurant suggestions will be wonderful. I just hope Eli has as much fun as Andrew and I will.

Very thankful for all that God has blessed me with. I am one very fortunate mommy with one amazing boy. He is growing up so quick and becoming such a sweet little boy. He calls me princess mommy sometimes and totally melts my heart. I always knew I wanted to be a mommy but I never knew how much I would love it. As I teach Eli new things everyday I am amazed at how much more he teaches me.

 Enjoying the park!!

 I ordered a kids small ice cream cone and we got the biggest ice cream cone ever! He was happy. (and sticky!!)

 Practicing writing our name with shaving cream.

 Eli and Sadie looking for deer tracks with Andrew!

After his haircut from Andrew and I. (Not to bad if I say so myself)

I have been blessed

We finished appointment 6 of 6 this week. I am so over appointments. On Monday, we went to the dentist at 10. Dr. Trey in Fairhope was amazing. His office is very nice and he was very entertaining. Eli was not very cooperative at the dentist but he had no cavities and everything looked great! After the dentist we went out for sushi at my fav restaurant. It was delicious! I decided to bring him over to my parents to take a nap before our next appointment at 2:00 to get his tubes cleaned out. I realized my gas light was very low so I decided to stop at a gas station to fill up. (by the way my phone stopped charging and died at the dentist that morning) I tried to turn my car on and the battery died....and I had no phone... and I was at the most unsafe gas station in the area..... and the battery charger that Andrew bought me was dead.... A very nice guy pulled up and let me use his phone to call my dad and we were able to get my car jumped off. We missed nap time and headed to our 2:00 appointment. I really did not want to go back to this doctor because the wait time in there is INSANE for having a 3 year old to keep contained. We waited almost 2 hours to see the doctor. I was not a very happy camper and neither was Eli. No nap, long wait and scared of the Dr was not a good combo. The Dr started cleaning out his ear and Eli was screaming "THE DR IS HURTING MY EAR!!" It took 3 people to try to hold him down. I had never seen him like that. I broke into tears and told the Dr to stop. We went home and had a very early bedtime. After a rough Monday, the rest of the week went much better.

Thursday we had our therapy day. OT went very well. Eli practiced handwriting with all kinds of very neat activities. He did 45 minutes of ILS and did it very well! Speech was a different story. He did do his sounds better but he was not as cooperative as he had been the last few weeks.

Things are beginning to slow down and becoming a little more normal. Now that we are done with the 100,000,000 appointments, life seems a little more normal. Thankful to have Andrew and Eli both home this weekend to spend time with my boys!

-Brittany

A week of firsts

Eli had a wonderful week this week. He went on his first field trip with his dad on Wednesday. They went to the park and the library and had a wonderful time. Andrew had the opportunity to speak with Eli's teacher about how he is doing in school. She said he does wonderful, especially for being a very young 3 year old. He shares excellently. She always has to ask if kids took toys from Eli instead of if Eli took a toy from someone because he is so giving. One of the staff told me this week that she has seen a huge difference in Eli's speech so that made me a very happy mama!

We have to get his ears and eyes checked before we can begin ILS so after his field trip, Andrew took Eli to go get his eyes checked. He did very well. He has perfect vision in one eye and 20/25 in the other but we were informed he would probably grow out of the slight far sightedness . There was a light that they shined in his eye of Tigger with a birthday hat on and Eli LOVED it. He followed instructions well and left with a huge smile.

Eli did EXCELLENT in his therapy this week. He played very well with the OT and moved from each transition with ease. He was not aggressive at inappropriate times. There is a book called No No Puppy that Eli loves to read. He gives really big belly laughs with each page. His laugh puts a big smile on every one's face. After OT we had speech. Again, another wonderful session. Our G sound is still a toughie but our K's  were much better. We started on SH for this week which he seems to be grasping with ease.

After therapy, Eli had a hearing test. We sat in a room with a bucket of blocks and waited for a sound to come over a speaker. After each sound, Eli would drop a block in a bucket. I did not think he would do this activity because of his short attention span and his love of building with blocks but he was such a champion. He listened with 2 types of head phones and one with out and passed with flying colors. One of his tubes has come out and the other is still doing its job. Having 3 appointments in one day is a lot for anyone, especially a 3 year old but I could not have asked for him to be a better trooper than what he was.

Since we had such a busy day with lots of appointments, we decided to reward his behavior with a trip to the fair. My dad has so many memories of going to the fair with my sisters children that he wanted to continue the tradition of taking Eli to the fair. Andrew, Eli and I met up with my parents at the fair and talk about fun! Eli felt like he was on heaven on earth. He wanted to ride everything! No matter how fast, high or dizzy the ride made you, he had NO FEAR! He wanted to ride the roller coasters 2 times, wanted the monster trucks to go faster and wanted the bumper cars to "bump something else". We ate popcorn and lemonade, rode every ride we possibly could, won prizes and had a wonderful night with the family. Eli crashed hard on the way home.

Today we had an appointment for a second evaluation with the school system for his speech. It lasted an hour and a half so his patients were really tested today. I asked the speech pathologist if she thought he would qualify and she said 100% he does. I will meet with them again in 2 weeks to go over his results and figure out a schedule to meet with them weekly.

Eli has his first dentist appointment on Monday. He is very excited so I hope it goes well and he always gets excited about going to the dentist/ doctor. (He does not get that from me!!)

I am so beyond blessed to be Eli's mom. He teaches me new things everyday. He has such a big personality in that little body. His innocence is something I pray he holds on to for a very long time. I pray that I am always led by God in all of the choices I make for him. I am so thankful to have him.

-Brittany

Busy Busy Busy!

We have decided to take a trip to Disney! We are going in February. The trip is more for Andrew and I since we have never had a vacation but what better place to get away for a week with a toddler than Disney World! I feel like a kid the night before Christmas and I have 5 months left to go... Looking very forward to the trip.

This week was a very busy week. We had a meeting for parents interested in the Integrated Learning System on Tuesday night. It confirmed our commitment to the program and we look forward to starting it after Eli passes his hearing and vision test. There was a lot of information and we are very excited to give this a try.

Eli has been a VERY active 3 year old this week. I know all toddlers have good weeks and bad weeks. This one was not our very best. He has had such a hard time focusing on any one activity for a period of time. If we are at home, he is usually OK but when we go somewhere outside of his comfort zone then he is a whole new child. He gets so wound up over everything around him that he goes into melt down mode. I know so much of this is typical little boy but it also does not take much for him to get over stimulated and throw a tantrum.

We had OT on Thursday. He was not as cooperative as what he usually is but Cindy is so patient in working with him and what his needs are that we worked through it. She keeps giving me ideas on how I can work with him outside of the house which is where we have our biggest issues. After OT we worked with Katie for speech. He was so good! Katie and I were very pleased with his progress. He followed directions well and transitioned from one task to another with ease which is HUGE for him. He also did not have to take as many breaks and was able to work through the session without getting angry or having a meltdown. He even worked in a normal play classroom. We have not been able to do that because he would get too distracted in those rooms before. So all in all, it was a great week. I am already able to see a HUGE improvement in his speech and so can others around him. He is trying very hard to pronounce all of his words clearly. (Although, sometimes I like the way he says some of his words wrong.)

We are meeting next week for his 2nd eval for the school system. I am very excited to start that also. Although I only work 2 days a week, we have speech and OT every week, school 3 days a week, and now a second speech class every week, I am one busy mama! I love it but the weekends sure are nice to be able to relax with the family.

On a different note, Eli has slept in the bed with me since he was very little. He hated his crib. We transformed his crib into a big boy bed. He liked it better but still liked our room the best. I actually enjoyed him sleeping with me because Andrew works nights 1/2 of each months. I enjoyed having him close to me with the dog in the room. For some reason I felt safe. I have known that it is probably for the best that he sleeps in his own bed soon because 3 of us in a queen bed was not the best night sleep anymore. Last week, I was putting him down for a nap in my room and he told me he wanted to go sleep in his big boy bed. I was just sure that he didn't mean it and he was going to say anything to get out of bed but we tried it and he went to sleep in his bed! For the last 6 nights he has voluntarily slept in his own room.  I am sleeping so much better but I miss my boy at night! I am so glad it became his idea to sleep in his bed instead of having to force it.

So that is what has been going on in the Thomas house for the last week.

-Brittany

Staying on the go

We have had such a busy couple of weeks. Between evaluations, classes, and work, I do not feel like there has been very much time for play. I kept Eli out of school to go to the beach yesterday. We had so much fun. It was our first time to go this summer, (which is so sad because we are only 45 mins away), but it was a wonderful day since most kids are in school and it was not a weekend. It was like we had the whole beach to ourselves. We went with our friend Mrs. Jessica and Rylee. It was a nice getaway before we are back to our busy schedule this week.

We had OT therapy today. Before therapy we went to the park with Rylee. I think when he is able to run and play before he has to sit down and work, it makes him calm down and listen better. The OT put Eli on a swing and played some different games with him. I was amazed that she was able to keep his attention for so long. She told me that because the swing was moving, his brain was tricking him into thinking he was moving. So he was able to sit still and focus while his body was still in motion on the swing. He loves his therapist and works with her so well. I am loving all of the ideas that she gives me to work with him since I have felt like I was at a road block with new ideas. We have decided to work with the ILS at therapy with each session instead of doing it at home. I think it will be helpful for him to have a therapist work with it and financially the best decision for us.

We had speech last week. Katie was amazed at how much progress he made with his G sound and how quickly he was to picking up his K sound. Before we left home for speech that morning, we had a major dance session (thank goodness no one was around to see my 'graceful' moves). I was hoping  that if we burned some energy, he would participate better.  We moved him into a room where there was not many distractions and just a few toys. It made a HUGE difference. I was very pleased with his progress. Now we are working on applying the sound with our words. Eli talks so fast so making him slow down and pronounce his sounds is difficult but I do see progress.

We are still waiting to hear back from the school system to see if he was accepted into their speech program. I am sure we will be and excited to hear their ideas also on different ways to work with Eli.
With all of the things we have had going on (work, school, speech, ot, etc...), it was so great to have a relaxing day with my sweet boy yesterday. Watching him grow and capturing his innocence is something that I enjoy so much and I just pray that I never get too caught up in everything else to stop enjoying the precious time I have with him.

-Brittany

Occupational Therapy Evaluation

I'm going to go ahead and say sorry for another really long post. I am wanting to use this blog to inform family and friends about what is going on but to also keep track of Eli's progress so there will be a lot of details that are probably only important to me.

We met today with the OT and the SLP. We spent 2 hours talking with them about how to work on the same page to get the best results for Eli. A LOT of information was given to us. Again, I cant express how great it feels to have someone understand where I am coming from and is very willing to work along side Andrew and I to work with him.

One of the first things we learned that an official diagnosis of SPD can not be given until he is 5 years old. Eli has not been diagnosed and can not be until he turns 5 but he has a lot of red flags that we will work on with him and test him again when he turns 5.  Eli has 3 areas of SPD that need a lot of attention: Auditory, Visual, and Vestibular. A lot of research has been done about integrated listening and the benefits it has on children with SPD. We would use headphones with a transducer on the top of the head to listen to classical music. The transducer at the top of the headset is a bone conductor which helps clear up how his ears hear things. Over a period of time, the music starts to remove low frequency sounds which can distract from the other sounds. This activity should help with frequencies that are difficult for him due to past ear infections. The benefits of integrated listening are very high and if it does not work for him, then it is not like trying it has done any harm.

Eli has colored on the wall multiple times... I have tried to talk to him about where we color and where we do not color. He does not seem to understand me. I have put him in time out. He does not seem to know why he is in time out. I have spanked him. He still does not get it. Within the last month, he has colored on the wall 6 times. I felt like I have tried everything to make him stop. I have not known how to handle him. Why does he keep doing this? How can I get it in his head to stop? How can I make him understand where we color and where we don't color?  Cindy will help me figure out what I can do to work with him. Andrew and I are learning that we may have to parent differently than most parents do and that is ok with us. We may have to think out of the box a little to get Eli to understand things. She said instead of trying the methods of punishment that have not been working, OVERCORRECT whatever he did. Make him clean the whole area, if he screams and cries it is ok but after he cleans it, go color where we are supposed to color. Just talking to someone who is willing to give us new ideas when we are lost for what to try next is very helpful.

Eli CRAVES hard play. His body needs it. He loves to spin, jump, run, hammer, and hit. Cindy is working with us on different activities we can do to give him the fulfillment of hard play/ pressure activities.

After our meeting this morning, Andrew took Eli to meet with the special services director for the Baldwin county public school system. He got evaluated for speech with them. We are going to work with both places. I could not be happier at kids kount but having someone work with us for free and work with the school system will be wonderful too. We will find out this week if he qualifies for their services.

We are learning so much and I am looking forward to what else we can learn about how Eli hears and interprets things.  I started this journey to strictly address Eli's speech. I had no idea that the struggles I was having with him would be addressed. I am so grateful to have 2 great therapist willing to work with us as a family to get the best help for Eli we can get. I am continuing to pray that God will lead us in the right path and for clarity on what we need to do for him.

Here are a few pictures from our play date with a friend we had earlier this week:

 -Brittany

Our fist therapy session

I took Eli to his first Occupational Therapy Evaluation today and his first speech class. I feel like both of his therapist connect well with him. Today was a little bit difficult for Eli because he work up with a low fever and did not feel himself but he was a trooper.I am looking forward to meeting with them each week and watching him progress.

We met with the OT first. She instantly saw some of the concerns that I had. She explained to me that because of the ear infections that he had previously, the way things are said to him and the way that his brain hears things are sometimes confusing to him. She told me that the muscle involved with the way the brain is processed is very closely related to his ears and that with time we will be able to strengthen the muscle with different exercises. She noticed that Eli has a very hard time staying focused. Whenever someone is not holding him or if he is  not in a confined space, it is very hard for him to learn things. When she tried to talk to him while he was standing up and looking at her, he was very uncooperative. She placed him in a desk that was very similar to a high chair and he became a totally different child. She said children with sensory problems do better when they are in a place where they feel secure. Places like strollers, car seats, bath tubs, high chairs, etc... She told me that in the bath tub is a good time to work on sensory skills because it is a place where he feels comfortable. Today was just an evaluation and I do not have official results yet but I left feeling like I now have someone work with me on how to work with him which has been my biggest concern. She told me to look at her as a partner to work with him. It made me feel awesome to know I have someone who understands what we are working through and that she is there to help me figure out the best ways to work with Eli.

After working with Cindy, we met with Katie, our speech therapist. Eli was getting a little bit overwhelmed from not feeling well, working with Cindy and now working with Katie too. Following instructions were very difficult but Katie was very patient with him and worked at his rate and worked on building a relationship with him. Today we worked on the letter 'G'. She worked with flash cards, incorporated trains, bubbles and other activities to get him to work on the G sound. She gave us some homework to work on for about 10 minutes a couple times a day. I can tell that Eli really wants to say words correctly so now that I am learning how to work with him, I think we will make progress very quickly.

I will meet with Katie again for speech at 10 next Thursday. At 3:00 on Thursday, Cindy and Katie will have a meeting with Andrew and I to figure out a game plan so we are all on the same page. I am very excited to have homework this week so that I can begin to work on things with him. Although some of the answers I am getting are not the answers I hoped for, I am so thankful I am getting answers. Again, I know we will get through this and come out stronger than we started.

Proverbs 3:5-6

-Britt

Speech evaluation

I received Eli's evaluation results for his speech. He is speaking at less than a 2 year old age. He has about 48 sound errors. She gave us some short term goals and some long term goals. We will go to speech for 6 months and then re-evaluate the situation. He will meet with the speech therapist every Thursday. We also have an appointment with the Occupational Therapist for this Thursday. It will be an evaluation and after that we will determine how many times a week he will meet with her. I am looking forward to getting some answers to my many questions.
-Brittany

Changes

I decided to start a blog because I love reading about other people and the journeys that life brings to everyone. I never really made time to blog because I do not feel like there is anything too interesting to write about in my life  on a day to day basis up until recently. I have one incredible little boy. I can honestly say that until he came into my life, I did not know that I was capable to have such unconditional love for anyone. Does he drive me crazy? We have our days. Do I enjoy always having Mickey Mouse or Super Why on TV? Of course not. Does my house stay clean? No, I find cheerios under the cushions very frequently. Would I change it for anything? NOT A CHANCE. I dont think my life would feel complete with out it. I didnt know why God allowed me to get pregnant before I was ready to be a mom but I now can see that his plans are so much greater than what I can understand. I also understand that God always answers our prayers even if it is not the answer that we think we want.

Eli did everything fast. He was fast to roll over, sleep through the night, crawl, and even get his tooth. I was in a contest with Andrew to try to get Eli to say 'mama' as his first word instead of 'dada'. We waited and waited for his first word. We both lost the contest. His first words were bye bye. (Daddy ended up coming before mommy) I was so surprised to see that he was not early to talk since he did everything else so early, but I had been told by many people that boys do not feel the need to talk like girls do. When he finally began talking, everything sounded like babble. I would hear other children talk and could understand what they were saying but it was a struggle to communicate verbally with Eli. Instead of saying Daddy, Andrew got the name 'Doowah'. He had about 3 ear infections and the doctors were not really worried with his speech and kept informing me that when he turned 3 he should be speaking fine. I realized that what they were telling me was probably true however, Eli did not say ANY of his words correctly. I was told many times that I was just a paranoid mother and that he would grow out of it. I was comparing him to other children and he will learn at his own rate.  Although I am sure everyone had good intentions of telling me this, I know my child better than anyone and I could tell something was just not right. I asked to doctor if he would refer me to a hearing doctor just to get his ears checked for my own peace of mind. I was told that he was probably too young (age 2) but he would let me get him evaluated. When I took him to the doctor, they did a test and said he had a ton of fluid behind his ears and the reason he probably did not speak clearly was because everything sounds baffled and like he is under water. We scheduled him to have tubes put in his ears the following week.

Since we have had tubes, we have not had another ear infection. His confidence in speaking has shot through the roof. He talks all the time and has a very large vocabulary. Although his vocaublary grew tremendously, only Andrew and I can understand most of what he is saying. The way he says his words makes for a very tough communication problem. I knew that I could get help through the school system when he turned three so I just prayed for him and let time take its course.

I notice that Eli can get very angry when no one knows what he is trying to say. He knows very well what he means to say but a lot of the time he has to repeat his words 3-6 times before someone can understand him. I know it must be frustrating for him and it breaks my heart when I can't figure it out. We started sign language some and he loved that. He learned very quickly and it helped him express himself in a whole new way.

There are some things he does and I never knew why he did it. For example, I probably have tell him 50 times a week not to hit the dog. I have tired verbally communicating why we don't hit her, time out, and even resulted to spanking him. Even though he hates being in trouble it would literally be two minutes later and he was hitting the dog again. When he wants my attention he grabbes my face and makes me look at him so I can try to figure out what he is saying but he pinches when he grabbes me. I tell him that it hurts and he looks at me like he does not understand. These are a few of the many issues that I have been struggling with him but I have always come to the conclusion that he is just a toddler and this is normal. So many times I have felt hopeless because talking to him would not work for punishment, taking a toy away did not work, time out did not work, he would laugh if I would pop his hand or his bottom and I did not know how to express to him that it is not ok to hit or pinch. He would just look at me confused as to why I am upset. I could not help but to wonder if he was just testing me or if he truly did not understand what I was telling him. He is incredibly smart and learns things so fast that I couldnt help but to feel like he was trying to get away with things. I cried many times because I did not know what to do to make communication easier. Does he act out for attention? Does he enjoy hitting? Am I doing something to cause this? Can I do anything to fix this? Again hitting the dog is just one example of very many things.

I have noticed that Eli needs to be held or touched a lot more than other children his age. He loves to be held. He will put my hand on his back and press it down for a close contact. I love my snuggle boy but I was just surprised that was still okay with mommy rocking him or holding his hand all the time. A lot of times he would lay down of the floor and press my foot hard into his back and want me to leave it there. He also did this with friends who came over, grandparents and Andrew. I thought it was odd but maybe for some reason he liked feet.

He turned 3 about two weeks ago and I very actively started perusing speech. I found a therapist that was wonderful! I felt like she would do a wonderful job with Eli and so I set up an appointment with her. Andrew and I took him to speech today. She evaluated him by doing flash cards and watching him play. She talked to Andrew and I and asked a lot of questions about his behavior. Eli really liked the therapist which made me happy because he has a very hard time opening up around new people.

The more questions he asked, the more I felt like she had known my child for years. She was addressing issues that I had been struggling with him for a very long time. She thought he was a very sweet boy who was very intelligent. She wants to continue to work on speech with him and thinks that the way he will pronounce his words will improve with time. She also said that she thinks he has a sensory processing disorder. An Occupational Therapist works with children with this problem and she wanted to refer me to one to help him. When we began discussing this issue, one of her questions was does he have a high pain tolerance. Andrew and I quickly answered YES! She brought up the hitting the dog situation and said that a lot of time children with this disorder do not know they are hitting. That he may honestly think that he is just petting the dog. When he grabbes me or pinches that he does not know that it hurts me because it does not hurt him. It explained so much to me about how sometimes I am talking to a wall and he continues to do the things that were getting him in trouble.She informed me that that is very normal because he probably does not understand what I am trying to say to him.

I know Eli is a good kid. He would never intentionally hurt someone. He shares with others and 99% of the time has a very good report home from school with him. I just did not understand why he kept doing things that got him in trouble numerous times but today I got answeres. I felt this overwhelming amount of guilt poor over me for punishing him so many times. For getting so angry because he didnt understand like I thought he should. I looked for ways to punish him for not obeying but I was not looking into what can I do if he doesnt get it. I learned that a lot of times children with SPD have this urge of pressure in their bodies and they can be aggressive at times with out knowing they are. That when he is climbing, hitting, or jumping on things all the time it is not for attention, it is because his body craves stimulation. From what I am learning about SPD there are two types: Hyposensivity and Hypersensitivity. Eli falls under the categoric of Hypo-sensitivity. Andrew and I did some research on it when we got home and so many of Eli's actions fall under this category. It basiclly is the need to be stimulated excessively. It explained him not being able to sit still, why he wants to be touched all the time, grinding his teeth and shaking some time. So many of my thoughts about some of his odd behaviour at times became something that I was understanding.

 I love my child and no matter what life brings to us I have no doubt that God will bring us through it. I do not have the answers that I want yet. I am so anxious for him to meet with the Occupational Therapist. I am so angry with myself for not knowing how to work with this disorder sooner. I hate the word disorder so I would rather call it a challenge. For the first time today, when I talked to someone about the struggles I have with him, someone listened and understood without thinking I am a helicopter parent or just worried over nothing. I felt such a relief but also an over powering wave of confusion. Where do I go from here? What is next? Will he grow out of this? What can I do to help?

He will meet with his speech therapist once a week and also meet with an OT once a week. I am ready for answers. I feel like my tolerance for the things that would get me upset is growing so much already from just having knowledge about the challenge that we are going to work through. I feel like we are starting him in the right direction at such an early age that we will be able to work through these issues and come out stronger as a family.

I love my child. I will love him always. There is nothing that he can do that will ever change that. I know no mother wants to feel like there is something in their child's life that can make things more difficult for them. I like most mothers, only want what is best for my son. I know God has a plan and a purpose for his life and I am so excited to see what the future holds for him.

There are so many things that I used to say before I had a child. I would say things like that mother needs to get her child under control, I would never let my child act like that, if I were her I would have spanked him and put an end to that..... I was so ignorant. I know now not to judge a parent by the tantrum her child is throwing in the store. I do not know that child or what that child goes through.  I have learned reasoning with a toddler can be near impossible. I know that no matter how hard I try, I will never be a perfect parent. I am ok with that. I have learned that life is not about raising the smartest, prettiest, most athletic, or most well behaved child. It is about the love and relationship built and the memories. So many times you can get caught up in trying to raise a good child and forget you already have one. I am blessed beyond measures. I know now that the little things are the big things. I can not worry about the future because I have no control over it. God reminds me so frequently that there is a plan and a purpose and he does not make mistakes. The plan he has my future is so much greater than anything I could ever want for myself. AND ITS NOT ABOUT ME...ITS ABOUT HIM! My goal is not to be the perfect family because I would be setting myself up to fail, but to raise my son to be Christ like and to do the best I can at being his mother.

So all of that to say this, I want to track Eli's progress through blogging. I want to learn from other parents who have gone through similar situations. I look foward to obtaining more knowledge on SPD.

First Blog

I've never had a blog before so here is a new first! I do not feel like my life is all that interesting but I enjoy reading blogs so I though, why not make my own? I am a full time  wife and mommy, part time ultrasound tech, passionate horseback rider, new runner, and most importantly daughter of Christ. I have been married almost 3 years to my wonderful husband Andrew and we have an amazing 2 year old named Elijah and a sweet boxer (who is like another child) Sadie. So that is my life in a nutshell. :)
 - Brittany